Welcome to another episode of season 3 of the Pick Me Up Podcasts. Today’s episode is all about helping you to operate from a place where you are tuned into yourself so you can feel like you again, feel in control and like you run your day and life.
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Transcript Of How In Tune With Yourself Are You?
Can I ask you, how in tune with yourself are you? How much time do you take to stop, and listen to what’s really going on for you, and then subsequently look at what you really need? Let’s keep it real, because it can be so difficult can’t it? Because in order to get to that place you need to be able to slow down and really quieten all of the noise that goes on around us. But the reality is, from the moment we wake up, usually to the moment we go to bed (and sometimes, for some of us, when we are even asleep), we are always on the go. Working to a schedule, running against the clock, doing what needs to be done in that moment, but thinking of the million other things that we need to tick off the to-do list, as well as adding a few extra things on there for good measure too.
But then we wonder why we are burnt out, tired, stressed, and feeling so snowed under with the demands of everyday life. And it’s then no wonder why we can’t even begin to get out heads around how we can feel like ourselves again.
What I can promise you is that it absolutely doesn’t have to be like that. Whilst I know that can be hard to believe when you are operating from that place, please trust me, that you can change that. So that is exactly what we are going to be talking about today: Operating from a place where you are tuned into yourself so you can feel like you again, feel in control and like you run your day and life, instead of feeling tapped out, like you’re always chasing your tail and like you can’t see the wood for the trees.
If you are in tune with yourself it can make the world of difference to how you go about your day because you really listen in to what you need. Therefore, instead of having an attitude of “just push through” and then ending up in some kind of burn out, if you can listen to what you need then you catch it sooner. So it might just be for example, that need an hour out, or an evening to yourself, or something like that rather than then just feeling completely off for a week or month or whatever.
So all of this sounds great right? But how do we even begin to approach this? Well I have plenty of tips to share around this, so make sure you grab your pens and paper, or a cuppa and some peace and quiet and really listen in, because I promise, if you can implement just some of these, it will completely change things for you.
Now I talk about this one a lot, in fact, I think it has come into pretty much every episode so far in some way. But, you have to have a clear idea of what it is that you’d like. So often we find ourselves complaining about everything that we don’t want, but we are not focused at all on creating the really clear image of what we do want. Even having that image in our minds is a total game changer in terms of being our motivator. It impacts our energy, our focus and our language. If this is something that you are struggling with then please head over to my free guide where I help you begin to work through this.
That said, it is not enough simply having your clear vision set out. So you may have a really clear idea of what “YOU” look like outside of motherhood. Who the “You” is again, how she feels, what she does. But you then need to be breaking that down into smaller chunks that you can work towards (I touch on this a lot more in the living with intention episode). Once you have those chunks, how much time are your carving out each week and day to actually align with those? Using this time as a check in to see how you are doing in relation to them, and looking at what you need to do today to get closer to that? If you can make this a priority, this time will become sacred, as it will be a time that you not only connect to that vision, but you connect to yourself. To what’s important, and where you’re falling short right now for yourself, and what you need so you can move forwards. Now, you may know by now that I am not about adding any extra stress, pressure of guilt into our lives, being a Mum comes with enough of that right? So just promise me, if you can implement this time for review/planning into your week/day, approach it with lightness and kindness to yourself. Don’t go beating yourself up for what you perhaps haven’t done, or should have done. Use it to become interested, get curious, find out what’s working, see what’s clearly important to you versus what you THOUGHT was important.
I make sure I carve out some time each evening before bed for my daily check in, and then on a Sunday evening for my weekly one, and boy do I notice if i let it slip for a couple of days. I end up feeling like I am just getting through again, with a lack of direction, focus or balance to my life. I feel like I operate from a surviving mentality instead of thriving.
My second tip is to journal. You will know by now that I am a massive advocate of this. There really is something so powerful about getting your thoughts out of your head and down onto paper. This doesn’t need to be a fancy exercise, especially if you’ve never done it before. Now don’t get me wrong, you absolutely can have a fancy new notebook for things like this (You know I love a good excuse for new stationary), but even if you grab a scrap piece of paper, that will also work absolutely fine. On a regular basis (this could be weekly, monthly, or anytime you feel tapped out, overwhelmed or stressed) ask questions the following questions:
What am I feeling right now?
Where am I feeling this? (Is it in your heart, chest, head, stomach etc)
How can I relieve these feelings?
What activities will help me with these feelings?
Sometimes we can get to that last point: what activities will help me with these feelings, and feel like we have absolutely no idea what the answer to that is, because we simply don’t spend enough time connecting with ourselves in that way. If you are not in tune with that stage, then it’s definitely worth taking the time to make a note of the things that make you feel good or relax you. And if you aren’t sure, then just use this as an opportunity to just play around to see what does help.
Some examples of mine include:
Having time to myself where I am not needed by anybody and have no noisy distractions. (Noise is definitely one of my triggers for making me feel stressed, anxious and overwhelmed.)
Getting outside into nature
Walking or doing some kind of exercise.
Creating some time to do activities that slow me down and bring me to the moment, like enjoying a bath, putting on a face mask, music and candles, or something crafty.
Cooking or baking something that I view as a treat (and isn’t dinner, don’t even get me started in the dinner/meal planning saga, you’re a Mum, I know you’ll totally get that).
By tuning into yourself in this way too, it helps to take any comparison away. In season 1 I recorded an episode titled comparison is the thief of joy, and it really is. As a parent, it seems to happen so easily, whether it’s looking at how we think other Mums are coping, what their babies are or aren’t doing, whether they have “bounced back” after having the baby, absolutely anything. And it most certainly strips us of any joy. But, by looking at what you enjoy, what makes you feel good, tuning into yourself, it acts as a way of strengthening your bond with yourself. Almost like you start backing yourself more, you feel more confident in yourself.
So for me, being active, feeling productive, and having a focus really ignites my spark. But for you, it could be that lying on the sofa and switching off ignites you. And that’s absolutely fine. Because if you know that, then you might see my Instagram stories for example, and instead of thinking “oh god, she’s out walking again”, or “she’s up super early again, I should be doing that too, otherwise I am not a good enough,” blah blah blah. You instead think, good for her, it’s great that she knows that what is important for her and makes her feel good. I can’t wait to enjoy my downtime on the sofa tonight.
Do you see the difference here?
But, that said, I would challenge you here to try it all. Because if this is a new concept to you, how do you really know what makes you feel alive if you haven’t given everything a go before? So try it all, have fun with it, and learn about yourself along the way. You might even surprise yourself.
Another one of my top tips is to remove all distractions. Our world is full of these isn’t it, whether it be through our phone, notifications, music devices, social media, television, other people. Spend some time getting comfortable with just “being”. This could be getting comfortable with your own company, or it could be in the form of meditating. When you can achieve this, it will allow you to listen in to what’s really going on for you, to then hear what you need and work out how you can get this.
So there you have it, a few of my top tips to really help you tune in to yourself, listen to what’s going on, what your needs are, and then how you can best meet those needs. What I can absolutely promise you, is if you follow through with these and you do really tune in, you will absolutely begin to feel like you have some control of the pace and direction of your life, as well as feeling that spark of who you are being ignited too.
So have fun with it, be kind, slow down, and enjoy it.
For now, I’m sending love, as always.
It has been great to connect with you
Thanks for stopping by, I hope that you found it useful. Please feel free to share any comments or questions you have below, and if you have any requests of topics you’d like to hear then I would love to know.