Welcome to another episode of season 3 of the Pick Me Up Podcasts. Today’s episode is all about the perfect approach for addressing the topic of feeling like yourself again when you are a busy Mum. This includes a plan around bringing this into life.
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Transcript of The Perfect Approach For Busy Mums
So I’m recording this at the start of January which is typically the whole New Year resolution time, “New Year New You”. Though I do feel like that’s starting to die down a little bit now, and you’re hearing much more around intention setting than new years resolutions, but there’s still definitely this pressure that you can feel to go into a new year with lots of new goals. Social media can certainly add to this can’t it, everyone is posting about it and if you’re not there you feel like you’re missing out, or you “should” be doing this too. Though it’s funny isn’t it because you say new year but lots of people are like “ah yeh new years day, that’s a Friday, then I’m not in normal routine and I’m not back to work or the kids aren’t back to school until the Monday, so I will start on the 4th, which in itself is like “okkkkay”. But it’s so easy to feel like you need to overhaul everything isn’t it, so from the 1st (or 4th) of January everything is going to be different, you’re suddenly going to start eating freshly cooked meals all prepared from scratch every single day, drink 3l water, go to bed on time and get 8hours of sleep every night, go to the gym every day after work: All these big things we put in place, but how much of that ends up staying? How much ends up sticking around. There’s this whole thing of willpower and staying power, and those “big goals” require so much willpower but that’s not what the staying power is. I feel like this is really important to discuss because I am doing a lot around achieving “something” at the moment; I am really passionate about working with mums and helping them to enjoy motherhood while also trying to feel like them, and I’m talking so much about this at the moment on my social media, my blogs and this season of podcast. But i think it’s really easy to get caught up in the notion of go big or go home. And I feel like its something really important to talk about. Why does it have to be go big or go home? It doesn’t need to be this big overhaul, because actually, according to Forbes “studies say that 80% of New Years Resolutions fail” so surely that tells us that the whole resolution thing doesn’t work, yet we feel like in order to achieve something new or feel like ourselves again, we have to be like “Right I will start on Monday, this is E-V-E-R-Y-THING I am going to do”. I can guarantee by Tuesday or Wednesday you might still be feeling good, Thursday things are starting to get a bit shakey, and by Saturday you think “fuck it” (excuse the language), grab the wine, and forget you ever even thought about feeling like yourself again. So let’s just do away with this whole go big or go home approach, and instead look at how we can create habitual change, and change over time.
So how do we even begin to go about doing that?
Well first things first is to have the thing that you’re working towards, (if struggling to know what it is with CLARITY by the way, then my guide starts to touch on that, but my book hugely covers that in terms of how you want to feel, what you want life to look life, what’s getting in your way and the things that you can do to overcome that), in mind.
But now you have that, it’s then about changing the approach. So, let me ask you a few questions: Thinking about what you’re working towards so maybe for example, it’s getting back to exercise and better eating habits, losing 2 stone of weight, and doing some activities on a weekly basis that you enjoy, If you were to get half of the way there by the end of the year how great would that feel? How different would life be? I know, I know, I said only half way there, but here me out…
If you take this approach, instead of thinking that you’ve got to get the whole way there by the middle of the year for example (going big) and never actually really get started because you can’t see the wood for the trees, or can’t actually find the crazy ass amount of motivation it would take to get this thing off the ground. Therefore meaning by the time you hit this time next year for example, nothings really changed. How great would it actually feel to have made some progress on this when you sit back and review it in a years time for example? Now of course, the timeframe is irrelevant, I am just using a year because we are talking about new years resolutions. But how great would it be?
This is something that I have personally been working on a lot, so I am talking from my own experience when I say all of this, but it has been a really big change for me, as I have always been somebody who is a go hard or go home kind of person, but, I found being a Mum, with such young children, it simply does not serve me to be like this. Maybe this will change as the children grow, but right now, I am all about making life as easy as possible and allowing all the plates to spin meaning I can apply some balance to my life. So what I am trying to do here is to encourage those who really want to make a change, but who also have so many other priorities too. It’s about finding a way to get the balance, and fit all of this in. So you can make a positive difference.
So how do you do this then? Honestly, this part couldn’t actually be more simple. You’ve already done the hard work of arriving at this space (well, part of the hard work, I’m not here to kid you, we know that the hard work is also when you start taking action right), but, this is about making that action as easy as possible. So it’s not going to be half as hard as you actually thought. So, have your goal, but then break it down. What is the smaller goal/s, and what actions do you need to do. Work on the smallest possible action that you could take which initially is in your comfort zone, so wouldn’t challenge you too much and then just build on it slowly from there. The idea remember is that this isn’t an overhaul, so make the action really small and easy, and something that doesn’t take heaps of willpower to even get started.
And for today, that’s it. Honestly, give it a go! I promise you will like this approach, especially as a very busy and in demand Mummy. This will really show you how easy it can be to feel like you, while also juggling other demands in life too.
But for now, I am sending you love, as always.
It has been great to connect with you
Thanks for stopping by, I hope that you found it useful. Please feel free to share any comments or questions you have below, and if you have any requests of topics you’d like to hear then I would love to know.